As a young girl, when my dad called me “crisse de folle” (effing crazy), it was the most painful thing. It hurt because when he said it, he was filled with anger and hatred. He hated my mother and I resembled her so much that he took it out on me after they divorced. I was eight years old.
Today if you tell me I’m effing crazy, I take it as a compliment. I am effing crazy! I’m crazy about butterflies, hummingbirds, sunsets, the lake, music, acoustic guitar, the arts, and dancing.
I’m crazy in love with my son, my mom, my brother, my friends and my extended family. And most of all, I’m effing crazy about the fact that I’m getting my health back after an eight year episode of being sick. It’s a slow battle uphill, but at least I’m climbing! One little step at a time.
So, to all of you who judged me, misused me, abused me! Eff you! I’m crazy and I like it!
A few months ago, I made a very specific request to the Universe. You see, after many years of failed relationships because I kept choosing men that resembled my father to share my life with, I have finally healed from my past and I’ve never been more ready for a healthy relationship.
I want to have fun! There aren’t that many years left to my life and I want those years to be nothing but bliss! In order to have the perfect partner for me, I placed my order as follows:
Dear Universe, I want a perfectly bilingual 57 year old man (yes! I specified his age). I want him to have had a full life, with all kinds of wild experiences, but who is now calm and wise. Someone who is done with heavy partying, someone with similar taste in music and who plays the guitar. Someone who would love coming to the lake with me. Someone who’s children are grown, someone who will encourage my creativity just as I will his. Someone who will take this slow… I want someone I feel comfortable with, where the conversation flows and last, but not least, someone who loves to cuddle and gives great hugs. I love hugs!
Well, I recently met someone who fits that description and I have to admit that it’s exciting and scary at the same time. I don’t want to be too pushy, and at the same time, I don’t want to lose this person as a friend. The first time I met him, I thought to myself as he walked towards me: “Yup! That’s the one!” and you know what? He gives the best hugs ever!
I hope this post won’t scare him away…
To be continued…
I woke up to some sad news this morning. Life can be so strange sometimes, so intensely unaware. I spent a couple of hours with a friend yesterday. I did a tarot reading for her. I even told her not to worry about finances, that she would soon get an inheritance and that things would go her way. Little did I know that as I was doing her reading, her mother passed away.
Life is so precious. Why do we go around like there’s plenty of time left? Why don’t people savor every moment they spend together? I know I’ve had my share of being careless and carefree, but not anymore. I enjoy every moment I spend with my friends and family, because I don’t know if they’ll still be around tomorrow. I call my mom and my son almost every day. I make it a priority to keep in touch with the ones I care about. Regularly, like clockwork. I care with all my heart. I listen attentively, I don’t judge, I mean, who am I to judge after the life I’ve lived? I have little regrets, what’s done is done, I have forgiven myself and have done the best I can to heal old wounds.
I’m scarred, but no longer broken.
To my dear friend, I’m so sorry for your loss. Know that I am here for you whenever you need me. May your mom rest in peace.
Last night, as I was chatting with a new friend, I made him a promise that I would write my first blog post in eight years. We were talking about a very sensitive subject: vaxxed vs. unvaxxed and how it has affected the people in our lives.
First, let me admit that I am a proud member of a fringe majority with unacceptable views. I am unvaccinated and intend to stay that way. The people around me who got a cold were all vaccinated… I mean, isn’t that what the jab is for? To not get the cold? One friend was particularly adamant about not getting jabbed for over a year until her boyfriend suggested they go on a trip. She got jabbed. She got Covid. My brother and I have had a few arguments about the jab… which is good… he’s still talking to me! Not like the rest of my family who have disowned me.
So, I got a cold last week. Is it Covid? Who knows? I didn’t take a test. Why should I? It’s inaccurate and useless. Why should I take it? To become a statistic? To make others aware that I have the cold? I’m smart enough to stay home and take care of myself. I wouldn’t go around putting people at risk for no reason. Would you?
This is such an intricate and delicate subject and there’s so much to say about it. Most importantly, this subject destroys lives. And we all know who we have to thank for it. I don’t know about where you are, but here in Quebec, the population is completely brainwashed by the media. We are one of the only places on the planet that is demanding a fourth jab. We are proud to announce that Moderna will have its main laboratory in Montreal. What is wrong with this picture? People are getting major health complications after getting vaccined provoking diseases and even death and they still want more? We are a sick people. Our leaders are clowns who find it more important to fill their pockets with cash than to protect its own people.
I’ve heard us being called “The Freedom People”. I’m not free! I’m fighting for my freedom! I’m a prisoner in my own country. I’m a modern day witch. What’s next for people like me? Am I to be burnt at the stake?